Something's gotta give...

This is the very essence of co-habiting and as a result of our many differences as humans; something’s always gotta give. I can hear someone asking “what does that even mean?” I will use the illustration from the movie played by Diane Keaton and Jack Nicholson with the same title (that movie actually inspired this article). Jack Nicholson plays the role of an old man with an adventurous spirit who likes to date younger girls and get all the excitement he can while at it. He then happens to start dating Diane Keaton’s young daughter and when they meet (Jack and Diane) she is not happy with the relationship and especially since she is an old fashioned introvert that believes things should be done a certain way. Eventually they both fall in love, jack has to give up his love for younger women and Diane also brings out the adventurous side of her from within.

We all believe that there is a ‘tailor made’ person especially for each one of us, which may be true to an extent, but how about widows who remarry? Where do they get another ‘right one’? Based on this belief, people tend not to bend rules to accommodate the other party and when the relationship doesn’t work out they will say ‘he/she wasn’t the right one for me’ or ‘it wasn’t meant to be’. You may never know how compatible you are with someone if you don’t learn to close your eyes to his/her flaws. This theory of mine is not just applicable to romantic relationships, any relationship between 2 or more people can flourish with this.

If we have to narrow it down to the romantic relationship, it is often more difficult since our deepest emotions are involved. No one wants to play the fool, no one wants to be taken for granted, and no one wants their heart broken in pieces but the real heart break is losing a loved one because you didn’t do the needful. That being said, I would like to lay emphasis on the aspects of ourselves that we choose to give up. NEVER give up your right to life, don’t stay stuck in an abusive relationship just because you want to accommodate the other person.  In fact, the abusive partner should be the one to give up that aspect of them for you. Bottom line is, Something’s gotta give; but we must be careful what does.