POETRY: THE COLOURS OF LIFE

When I think Love,

I see Red.

When I think Evil,

I see Black.

When I think holiness,

The color White comes to mind

So I ask myself; what is the most important color in life?

It could be Red because our blood flows in rich shades of it

Or could it be blue? Considering the skies and the sea make a beautiful blend

Perhaps! Green that represents life and nourishment is the one

And just when I sit back and smile in satisfaction, It occurs to me

Flowers portray beauty as reflected by their various rich colors

Yellow, Purple, Pink, Lilac,Orange

And then there is You and I,

You are White and I am Black

A perfect reflection of his glorious works.

PARENTING; A NECESSARY EVIL

Often times I have heard parents refer to their kids as their best friends and vice versa, that just leaves me astonished considering the idea is alien to me, 1^st because I didn’t experience it and secondly…you’ll find out as you read on.

In avoidance of misunderstanding the noun parenting, I chose to look it up in a dictionary (Longman Dictionary of contemporary English). Parenting is the skill or activity of looking after your own children, as an activity I am made to understand it has no stop date. Hold up, I just heard someone ask “what does she even know about being a parent?” you’d be surprised how much one gets to know just by being an onlooker. During a conversation with a dear friend of mine, I was teasing him as usual and calling him “omo mummy” which could also mean “mummy’s pet” because he is the last child and his response gave a whole new meaning to this article that was already in the works.

4 TOP CONVERSATION STARTERS

I have always wondered why a guy would be nervous to talk to a lady he admires, we don’t bite na. Ironically ladies desire for guys to make a move at every opportunity, it keeps our confidence up (sorry for breaking the girl code ladies). Out of curiosity I went out of my way to find out the reason for this and it turns out many of them are scared of rejection but guess what! A smooth talker can hardly ever be rejected, ladies believe what they hear- Remember? All ye doubting Thomas (es) can get confirmation of this from your player protégés and because I am 100% sure that a good player never reveals his secrets, you will fall back on this article written by me-a mere female. OK, so now that I have your attention are you willing to let me tell you how to become a smooth talker? Please read my top 4 conversation starters and before the end of today, you will be talking your way into that precious lady’s heart.

CELEB OF THE DAY: HAPPY BIRTHDAY IKECHI

What a way to begin the year. Yesterday was Ikechi's birthday and he's beautiful wife Fam went all out with a lavish surprise dinner party that held at the Charcoal Restaurant in wuse 2 Abuja. After weeks of planning, some coded phone calls and text messages, Mr Nwigwe walked in looking pleasantly surprised. On this note, Dear Mr Right (hoping you are reading) your lady love here won't mind a surprise either-LOL

P.S: You and your loved ones can also be celebrated in style, just send an email to ticiatowns.@gmail.com.

More photos after the cut...

A TRIBUTE TO 2013

Every youngster aspires to live the dream some day and for most like me who come from small, fairly developed states that may not even be identified on the map or have been heard of just once: not for the best reasons one can think of, we can only fulfill these dreams by moving to the larger cities and I chose Abuja the Federal Capital Territory. My journey in Abuja started about 4 years ago (wow, I can’t believe its 4 years already), I remember it clearly just like it was yesterday. Fresh out of youth service, with high hopes of landing my dream job with ECOWAS (since that was what mum told me to convince me to study French, not that I regret it though) being independent in every sense of the word at a very young age and falling in love with one HOT dude, getting married… it was nothing short of picture perfect.

A runs girl’s worst Nightmares

I have been cracking my brain for an appropriate and PG description for a runs girl, for the benefit of those who may not understand the terminology and trust me it has proven to be very difficult. For lack of a better instance, let’s just say a runs girl is into the property exchange business (the property being her body for his money of course).  While most people may abhor and judge runs girls, there are still a fraction of ladies out there who envy them and want to be in their shoes. To experience their lifestyle, the money they get to handle and people they meet. She uses the latest gadgets, shops wherever and anytime she wants, she wears the finest and most expensive weaves and has all the connections with politicians and socialites; technically she is living the life. It may even seem as if she has found an ‘easy’ way of making money; after all is it not just sex? How hard can that be? They might ask but my dears, it is way beyond sex and their lives aren’t as picture perfect as portrayed so to drive my point home, here are a few nightmares these people you admire also face.

THE HASSLES OF DATING A TWIN.

My friend Sandra is dating a twin, a few days ago was to be their birthday and Sandra was in a dilemma. She came to me seeking friendly advice and asked “Leticia this cake I am making for Taiye, should I write happy birthday to Taiye and Kehinde”? “As how na?” was my reply “is Kehinde also your boyfriend?” and with those very words came the idea for this article. While I kept teasing her about the hassles of dating a twin, Sandra claimed that twins are also normal human beings and so there is no difference in dating a guy who is a twin or who isn’t but I plan to prove otherwise after this article.

Happy married life Dooyum and Paul (white wedding)

We all remember Dooyum and Paul from their traditional wedding don't we? These two love birds had their white wedding on Saturday 23rd of November 2013. The Bride chose Red, Ash and White for her colors and I must say they came out looking very lovely. Ticiatowns wishes you a blissful ever after and lots of children; Amen.  More Photos when you continue

With THESE I thee wed

Yes you read right. It’s not a typographical error; I meant to say “these”. Have you ever wondered how a little gold ring (some don’t even have the decency to buy you a gold ring sef, but going by the colour permit me to call it gold) is exchanged between a couple as they read their vows saying “with this I thee wed” and they go ahead to pledge their bodies, loyalty, submission, money and every iota of emotion and feeling to each other? Aren’t all these things enough to change that phrase to “with these I thee wed”? Whoever coined that phrase really needs to meet me for a one on one because right now I am bitter and out for a change*straight face*

Where is that Patient dog?

According to a popular proverb they say the patient dog eats the fattest bone but I say the patient dog waits so long sometimes the fastest bone isn’t enough (but it is better than none). As a Nigerian that I am, there are many incidences we experience daily which discredit this proverb and cause you to seat down and think twice, probably even get mad at yourself and whatever made you believe that patience would work for you. This virtue is tested every day, at the market place, while using the ATM, or even waiting to use the convenience at a restaurant or the saloon. Do you ever pass these tests? I guess we all know that the more you pass your tests the better you get in that subject and the more confident you will be in that field but even when you fail, it is not enough to give up cos trust me, there’s another test just right there waiting for you to take it. I want to let you in on a little secret…Patience births courtesy.

More photos of Baby North West revealed

 

Kim Kardashian today shared more photos of 5month old daughter North West aka Nori on her instagram page. You may ask me how that is news, well if you are a child of 2 famous parents with a unique name then you have no choice but to make headlines.Also all eyes are on the toddler to see if she'll possess the good looks of her mama (my eyes are on her sha, I don't know about yours). Another photo after the cut.

Happy married life: Dorothy weds Tom

On the 1st of January 2013(New year), Tom made a new year resolution- To spend the rest of his life with this Southern belle Dorothy* awww, that's so sweet* Fast forward a few months later, on the 9th of November 2013, all roads led to Bayelsa for the traditional rights where the journey into marital bliss would begin for these 2. I'm such a hopeless romantic now see the love in their eyes... more photos after the cut

WEAVES: In or Out?

Growing up I heard a story not sure how true it is though, of a woman who was wearing a weave on a bus and when she came off the bus another lady who turned out to be a spirit asked her to give back the weave she had on claiming it was her hair. After much struggle the 1^st lady removed the weave but later died on getting home. This story meant that weaves were gotten from dead women and somehow had spiritual implications for people who used these weaves. Over the years the kind of weaves used by ladies have evolved tremendously, gone are the days of synthetic hairs like Darling Yaky, premium too, Noble etc the trend in weaves now are human hairs such as Peruvian, Malaysian, Cambodian, Brazilian etc. When human hair hit the scenes a few years ago, it was a way of “showing your level” in the female kingdom. The kind of weave and length of it determines how “big” you are; Husbands and boyfriends are being put on the spot to buy human hair and comedians have also gotten a big break in their careers joking about it. They say A lady Who is wearing Brazilian hair and complaining of headache doesn’t need a prophet to tell her that she’s carrying plots of land on her head and that armed robbers this days no longer say “your money or your life” but instead they say “your hair or your life” LOL. These entire jokes center on the monetary value of weaves, yes they were quite expensive when they initially entered the market. People were spending hundreds of thousands just to buy hair but I mean, weaves are to ladies what wristwatches are to guys so let us splurge biko *tongue out*. This was also the point when every guy seemed to be #teamnatural# claiming they prefer their ladies to look natural (yet they’ll be tripping for Kim Kadarshian and Beyonce) just because their avarice wouldn’t allow them see the ease of using weaves. Yes I say ease because it is better to buy one good hair that’s easy to comb and use always than buying synthetic hair that would tangle after 2 days of fixing and if you think I’m lying try running your hands through my hair and see if you can tell the difference (hehehe bragging rights). Need I even mention the beauty, style and class it adds to a lady? So all that being said, I know we still have our preferences so for those of us who still prefer some good authentic weaves, below are a few photos to wet your appetite and you can Contact Mimiee for 100% Human hair on -

08037845963 to place your orders

Catching the Bouquet: A twisted myth.

Anyone who knows me well knows that I love going for weddings. There’s a lot about weddings that make me want to keep going even if it means crashing the party (let he who hasn’t crashed a wedding cast the first laugh). From the décor, to the music, the feel of love in the air, the high earn fashion that entertains and the food of course (you didn’t think I wouldn’t mention that did you?) but most importantly, I like being part of a couples’ most beautiful and memorable day. Parts of the memories made on that day include throwing the bouquet by the bride. This is when you see ladies who are supposed to be the brides’ friends doing all the ‘effizy’ in the world. The MC can scream all he wants yet everyone still stays glued to their seats, is it because they are shy? Or they don’t want to be seen as “single ladies” as that’s usually the song the DJ plays in the background but truth is even if you come out or not, it doesn’t automatically mean you have ported from single to married.

Be warned! Dieting is not mocked!!!

Nike is a diet freak! Everything sweet has been deleted from her menu, she eats only boring stuff like wheat biscuit, wheat bread and in fact anything wheat is considered a meal for her. Whenever she discovers a new "interesting" menu she comes to work happily to share her new discovery which most times is of no use to me. I always wonder how she copes and and when I asked she said she disciplined herself to start enjoying these foods. By the way Nike is my colleague and she’ll probably kill me after reading this but I have to give my readers something to read now so please pardonez moi (I had to say that in the language of love and hopefully it’ll do the trick and keep me alive; LOL) So back to the gist, one faithful day I checked Nike’s PM and She was craving Cookies and Milkshake, none of which are made of wheat and when I chatted her up she said “abeg let me indulge myself, 1 day won’t hurt”. The response I gave her is what inspired me to write this article “Dieting is not mocked”.

Dooyum Weds Paul

 Dooyum and Paul Completed the traditional rights of their wedding on Saturday, the 2nd of November 2013. The bride who hails from Buruku local government area in Benue state had friends and family travel down to make the day a memorable one for the couple. The bride looks really pretty and as guys will say "Paul carry eyes enter market*lol. Wishing you both a happy married life. More pictures after the cut...

AED at Forty not Rusty

On Monday, 28th October 2013 Emmanuel Adejo aka AED proved to us that 40 does not mean Rusty as he celebrated in grand style with friends and family at THE CLAN CAFE in Maitama, Abuja. Happy birthday in arrears sir, more photos after the cut...

THE BENUE CARNIVAL

Benue Carnival is a cultural carnival and an annual event that began five (5) years ago. The event is a celebration whereby Benue indigenes are allowed to showcase their God given talents to the world. Individuals or groups who perform credibly are awarded prizes and selected based on merit for sponsorship to represent the state in cultural events in Nigeria and beyond.
Culture is a veritable tool for social and economic development. The main vision of this event is to integrate the various cultural behaviors in the state with those of other ethnic groups from other parts of Nigeria and nations at large.

Pick up lines: Funny vs. Dumb

One of the things I enjoy most about being a female is listening to various pick up lines that guys use. It is not new to anyone by now that women are tripped by what they hear but some pick up lines end up becoming “drop offs” aka game spoilers. It is unbelievable to think that once upon a time people used to write letters in this manner: “It is with deep love in my heart that I pick up this golden pen from my basket of roses to pour out my love for you” others would even say “As I was sleeping a bird sang with a golden voice that reminded me of you and your angelic voice so I decided to write you this letter” (OK so I made up this second one lol) maybe the literature books we studied then influenced us but this is way beyond Shakespeare, it would rather pass for dumbspeare. Imagine a guy walking up to a Politician’s daughter to say “Is your father a thief?” He’s innocent pick up line will land him a dirty slap before he gets the chance to add “because he stole the stars and put them in your eyes”, in fact at this point he will be the one seeing the stolen stars in his eyes…hehehe.

Blackberry owners are not smiling: The beef between blackberry and Android phone users.

I would like to share with you the broadcast message I got yesterday that motivated me to write this article:

We the Blackberry users association of Nigeria have decided not to accept any request from non- blackberry users. If you like be using iphone5, galaxy S4, Nokia camry, Tecno G wagon, we won’t accept! If you must ping go and buy a blackberry and suffer phone hanging and battery problems like us!

Signed:

Bad Belle Movement (BBM)